Alas, I should have posted this entry this Wednesday, right after the HC investiture, with that particular sentiment and that particular mood, if only I didn’t need to catch up with my work. My blog has been wordy all the time, but well, I am just simply not used to use msn English here. So, here it begins.
Mentioning about HC Camp, a few phrases can describe it in more detail and vividness than an entire chunk of paragraph does. Memories of last camp, reflection of me per se, words of encouragement from peers, and intense pressure. They all came back. To life. The night we walked back from Tampines, exhausted we were; the night we disappointed our seniors, self-condemned I was, the pact of the three; the morning when we were late and were punished to run a 2.4k; the morning when I tasted salty and bitter sea water and had sands all over; the moment someone encouraged me as we ran back from jetty…
Looking at my juniors. Watching them in the eyes. They were struggling, sweating, shaking, and panting. No matter what, I kept recalling the past. It simply reminded us of ourselves. Juniors, I know you were trying your best, I know too well that you had been drained from night-walking and have not gotten enough rest; some of you were pushing yourselves to the limit, you could not complete the PT and your arms could support yourselves any more. Watching you all, I was in pain, but it is a trial that all leaders have to go through, it is about the determination in mind, which transcends mortal capability, about transforming each other’s encouragement as a form of energy and persevere, about achieving a miracle, looking back and discover that is not an impossible. Truly, I myself also had regrets. Tiong Wei and I spent some time discussing it, and thanks to him, his philosophy worked and I found my direction now. That is my experience during the 09 HC Camp, familiar, but more insightful.
The Investiture in the Auditorium was another main event for the 16th. After having our friendships for a year, it was hard to say goodbye. But as Cheryl has said, goodbye is never an apt word for this occasion. Regina Spektor has once sung in The Call (I always said that her voice was like an angel’s):
Now we’re back to the beginning
It’s just a feeling and no one knows yet
But just because they can’t feel it too
Doesn’t mean that you have to forget
Let your memories grow stronger and stronger
‘Til they’re before your eyes
You’ll come back
When they call you
No need to say goodbye
May the precious friendships and memories remain to an eternity.
Watching the juniors in my seat, I could picture the moment when we were standing on the spot where they were exactly standing. It made my throat felt uncomfortable. When I took off my House Committee Badge and pinned for Huang Rui, telling him about this 6-year-old Badge, I choked my words, for more than once. But when we cheered in the end, I cheered in the top of my lung. I knew this was my last cheer. I pictured Theen Yew telling the OGMs of Xcion in a fine afternoon of January that they must cheer as if this was their first and last cheer. This was the moment. The end. And I must cheer this way so I would not regret it.
A great basketball game on Thursday, with Jia Wei, Grace, Kirk, Ellery, Zhihao, Jun Yang, Wilson, Jovian, Thaddeus and Jerome (there should be more, but my apologise for not able to recall). I have not touched the ball for a long time, but some sense did come back when contact has been made to the ball. Even though I have no plan to train up for this so far, I knew I will, after As.
Napha Test yesterday. My friends said that we did not need to treat it so seriously since we are non-Singaporeans. But I did not wish to lower my standard because of this. This is an excuse for endeavoring. I tried hard and I knew I did not fail myself.
It is late now. Time to brush up my concepts tomorrow. Otherwise my physics tuition teacher will shake his head and sigh if I ask something that I am suppose to memorise next week. Adios amigos.
